Thirteen Ways to Kill Lulabelle Rock

by Maud Woolf

2 out of 5

Synopsis

A washed up star creates a clone tasked with eliminating other clones of herself; a whip-smart and thrilling sci-fi read that's perfect for fans of Orphan Black, Killing Eve and Keeping it Real by Justina Robson.

Set in a world of the near future, the celebrity elite have access to a technology that allows them to make perfect copies of themselves, known as Portraits. These Portraits exist to fulfil all the various duties that come as the price of fame.

Our protagonist is the thirteenth copy made of the actress known as Lulabelle Rock. Her purpose is very to track down and eliminate her predecessors.

While initially easy, her task is made difficult by the labyrinthine confusion of Bubble City and the unfortunate stirrings of a developing conscience. When she makes the mistake of falling in love with one of her targets, the would-be assassin faces the ultimate question; when you don’t want to kill yourself, what’s the alternative?

Review

Lulabelle is the thirteenth clone/Portrait of actress Lulabelle Rock, she has been created with a single purpose - to kill the others.

I received a free copy from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

The story follows the thirteenth clone of Lulabelle Rock, as she wakes and is given a single mission, a car, a gun, and a folder containing information on each target.

It's set in the near future where Portraits have become a regular part of society - they're still very expensive, so most Portraits are of famous people, who want and need visibility.

This book was weird. 

In reviews, I normally start with the good stuff, and follow with the bad; but it's really hard to pin down any part of the plot, characters, writing, etc. that stood out as good. For me, they were all just ok. I was intrigued enough to keep reading, but never truly enjoyed any aspect of this book.

It felt like the story didn't know what it wanted to be. It mused on the meaning of life and death, but didn't feel like our narrator made any personal growth. It also mused on absolutely everything else, sometimes going in circles, and sometimes musing over things with zero relevance to what was going on.

The plot was similarly unfathomable. I didn't get it.

It started off quite promising, but then had some random tangents, before completely going off the rails; and then acting like it was going with the plan all along; and then derails again.

And then the ending, or lack thereof.

I didn't get it.

The main character was a nice person, there was nothing about her that stood out in her personality - she's one of those nice, bland people that you like, but doesn't stand out in any way. She doesn't do anything to move the story forward, she goes along with whatever people around her decide. Some of it feels like naivety; she still feels like a child, new to this world, naturally submitting to everyone older than her (which is practically everyone).

I was very disappointed with this book. I thought it had a lot of promise, but it just felt like it couldn't decide what it wanted to be.

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